Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Help Wanted

I thought I'd coined a clever term the other day, when I joked that bloggers like me (and the blogger I was IM-ing with before my company BLOCKED IM!) are "microbloggers."

Well, apparently I'm only as clever as a Catskills joke set, because, unbeknownst to me, who is nothing if not only marginally aware of the world around me, the term microblogger has been in general and common use for quite the little while now.

However, the term, as I understand it, applies not only to bloggers like me, who receive a pittance of hits a day (but, y'all, THANKS for stopping by) but also to those bloggers who receive hundreds of hits a day.

Take a moment to reflect on that while you catch your breath, because I know, the mention of the fabled HUNDREDS OF HITS A DAY is powerful blogger mojo and your blood pressure may just have risen a few points.

Back to the question at hand, or, at the very least, on my mind: Do you know what that blanket application of the term microblogger means? Do you?

Yes, fine, at first blush it might mean that I (and perhaps you, if your hit count is in the same range as my almost indescribably pitiful one) am grouped with bloggers who receive HUNDREDS OF HITS A DAY, a glorious and seeminglly unattainable goal, and hey it's nice to feel part of such an august group, but on second thought I think that the notion of "microblogging" has a second implication, not as rosy or collegial as the first.

Here's what I'm talking about: I think all us "not hundredsofhits a day" bloggers need to secede from the microblogging world and coin a new term that better describes our remit. A term that will set us apart from those showboats with their HUNDREDS OF HITS A DAY. A term that will allow as to how we, the great and impressively talened (and prolific!) majority of bloggerdom, are MORE than special, MORE boutique-y and quirky, MORE rareified than those bloggers who have entered into such common parlance as to risk being hacks of their own success.

But, I am at a loss for arriving at a term that will adequately capture our nation of not-quite-microbloggers.

My first thought was to go through the scientific notation, digging down through the layers to orders of magnitude LESS than "micro." "Nanoblogger" has rather a nice ring to it (plus a rare "Mork and Mindy" semi-attribution, which can only be a good thing), as does "picoblogger," which hints at something spicy and potentially very interesting. Going down further, there's "femtoblogger," but if one doesn't know the deriviation one might think that it had something to do with women's rights, so maybe that one's out but for the mommybloggers who haven't yet reached the level of fame that inevitably comes when one blogs almost exclusively of the mommy-dom (don't hate, y'all, you KNOW it's true).

So, those options being a little obscure, except for those of you who know from your scientific notationalisms, what about "miniblog?" "Scintillablog"? "Mite-a-blog"?

It's clear I need help getting this zeppelin off the ground. What would YOU call your wee blog traffic, if you're one of those people who aren't getting HUNDREDS OF HITS A DAY and are tired of getting lumped in with those gluttonous hoarders of readers?

(An aside - if I ever, and I mean EVER, get to the point at which I'm regularly receiving HUNDREDS OF HITS A DAY, I will remain true to my as-yet-to-be-named roots and not let the heady winds of success blow me off the course of driveldom that has brought me to this fair point).

Please, feel free to leave your suggestions in the comments.

(Authot's note: it seems as thoug Haloscan is down. Short of just saying "screw it" and letting your great idea wither in the wind of ingominy, please e-mail me at and I'll put your inspiration on the list!)


This one is short today, because I have just been invited to dine at the Indian Buffet, and, even though it's only 11:15 here on the East Coast, all the good seats are gone by 11:45 so you have to get up pretty early to get the dal, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

More tomorrow.


Oh, and later today the links to the Wordsmiths spooky stories will be up - some damn fine writing going on, and I'm not even TALKING about Elegia and her woes. Which was also good, but not as good as the other stuff, which of course you'll go and read, because I'm begging you to and will say nice things about to anyone who asks if you do.

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