All's right with the world until something's wrong.

 

Pays to read the instructions.

Have you ever had a stye in your eye? 

Terrible things. 

The one on my right eyelid has been there for WEEKS now, which is testament to my (probably) continued immunocompromized state of things.  Just a nasty, bulgy, swollen lump that sometimes oozes and sometimes crusts over and sometimes just freaking HURTS so I poke at it a little and then it hurts more because I am an idiot.

It's only natural, the poking at things.

It was obvious that more needed to be done to combat this weirdo, so I went to the CVS and got a 'hot compress' pack that you can stick in the microwave to heat up, then apply to your eye for a few minutes, which is supposed to draw the infection out (SCIENCE!).  I had high hopes.

Which were dashed as soon as I pulled the thing out of its package, and noted that there were little beads of something falling out of the internal pouch of whatever it is that's supposed to heat up.  Fairly certain that this was not a thing that was supposed to happen, I tested the breach and saw some sort of liquid oozing out, which also didn't seem like a thing that was supposed to be happening.  How was THAT going to be comfortable when applied to my poor sore eye?

So back to the CVS it went.  A new item, same make and model as the old one, was chosen to replace the defective unit, and by gosh if it wasn't 1) encased in a sealed plastic covering (unlike the first one), and 2) in two pieces (heater and cover) unlike the first one which came as one piece already put together.

Bottom line: someone bought the first one, used and broke it, and RETURNED IT TO THE STORE, which thereupon put it BACK ON THE SHELF for some jamoke like me to purchase and potentially injure themselves with.

And I know HOW they broke it too.  Those warnings on the instructions to not heat up in more than 10-second bursts in the microwave are the real deal, but someone, somewhere, in my town decided they knew better and BLEW THAT SUCKER UP after cooking it too long.

They must have needed that 11 bucks back pretty bad to return it as defective.

Good news: the original unit is now in the 'defective bucket' that the CVS employees appear to keep under the front counter.  Hoping it gets chucked back to corporate or wherever and not recirculated.

Because, EW.

Tiff out.