Wednesday, June 02, 2010

I'm Amazonian Enough, thank you

Blogger would like me to link to Amazon in my posts, or maybe in my template, I'm not entirely sure.

To which I, being the anti-follower that I am, say 'tish tosh'! That simply smacks of money grubbing by a company that is already nostril deep in so much cash they could wipe their toddler's snotty noses and stinky bums with 20's and still not notice a shortfall come payday.

So, no. No to the Amazoniation of this wee bebbeh blog.

Therefore, let it be said that NAY is like the revolutionary upstart of underground communications devices - you find it by accident, become entranced by its messaging, and keep coming back even though there's no discernible path forward and the people who hang out with you are both marginally dangerous AND spectacularly attractive.

That's simply a mix you can't buy with Amazon, and quite possibly a reason NOT to. (raises fist) Power to the Little People! Power to the creators of free content! Power! Power!

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Also, I'm afraid to find out that this little nook in the webiverse would actually be a DRAG on the overall thrummingly successful machine that is Amazon, and they'd chuck me out the club posthaste on noticing the black hole of suck that is NAY from time to time.

Yep - best to pretend I'm a counterrevolutionary than admit that I once had dreams of enormous commercial success for this dusty dark corner of the WWWeb, that have now languidly dwindled to Stage B at the County Fair status (at best).

Which probably makes sense to nobody but me.

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And Dooce has a teevee show now.

Where's that gagging spoon?

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Also! I am the proud grower of a basal cell carcinoma. Woohoo! Go me! I'm a Toomah Fahmah!

Of all the cancers to get, this one's OK - slow growing, almost never metastatic, and nearly 100% of the time it's treatable with Moh's surgery alone. So, I'm not freaking out or anything, but if you'd like to offer up some words on my behalf to the All-Powerful deity of your choosing regarding a swift resolution to this thing, I'd appreciate it.

The lesion is on my jawline, so the surgery and any resulting scarring won't be so bad. Secretly, I'm hoping they have to do a lot of....lifting....to get the surgical edges approximated after excision. Hey, I turned 48 a couple of days ago, that shit is starting to sag in a most major fashion. I figure that the surgical area will wind up being maybe the size of a dine at most, so stitchery post-surgery should be easy to deal with. If not, then I'll have an awesome HOLE IN MY HEAD to take pictures of and gross everyone out with before heading over to a plastic surgeon's office to have a flap of skin slapped over that sucker for easy healin'.

I've done my research, as you can no doubt tell. If I had some lidocaine around, I might be so bold as to try to excise it myself, but alas I'm fresh out of anesthetic and so will have to cough up the copay to have a professional do it.

Grumble Grumble.

I'm hoping to have the surgery done in the next few days. You can be SURE I'll keep you posted on events as they warrant.

In the meantime - kind thoughts to y'all, and I'm hoping to get some back in return.

Tiff out.

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