Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Tickle me Pollen

Ah, March in NC, how I love thee.


There are trees in bloom, the daffodils are up, there boidies is choipin, the landscape crews have reappeared from their long winters' absence, and all seems right with the world.

Except.....those trees that is a-blooming and the flowers that is a-poppin' are, naturally, shedding pollen like it's their own personal orgy and we're in their daggone way. Why, I can't even drive home in the evenings with the windows down, enjoying the warm air while cranking out some tune-age without my eyes commencing to watering and itching and burning.

It's too early for that kind of thing. I usually wait until at LEAST the chartreusy blankets of oak pollen cover my car after a day in the parking lot to start with the watery itchification. Could I be getting sensitized to North Carolina's flora? Three springs in this state have turned me allergic to nature.



Those of y'all still under winter's continuing weather advisory, please don't tell me I shouldn't complain about an early spring, I can TOO complain if I want to, It's MY reality, and I'll bitch if I want to. You don't see ME telling you to hush about the snow and ice and cloudy gray doldrum skies, do you? No, you do not, for I am polite like that and realize that everyone has a right to drone on and one, relentlessly, about their own particular meteorologic irritations. I certainly do.

Heh - just WAIT until summer. I can do a full ten minutes of the suck of NC in August.


Why do some convenience stores smell like vomit?


Also, how do blind people know when they're done wiping?


Does anybody else's dog throw up when they get excited?


It looks like I'm a-gonna be a part of the Carnival of the Mundane again. I recommend y'all take a meander over there and take a moment to consider contributing something to the melange of goodness that is sure to be the next installment of mundanity. Truly, it is a thing of beauty, for a compendium of posts from a variety of authors on the everyday is fascinating reading for all us voyeurs and thrivers-on-the-vicarious.


And I leave you today with a poem, because I feel like it.

It was GOING to be about poop, but Biff gave me another-another idea and I went with that instead, because I'm thinking that vomit/poop/vomit question string up above might have been enough gross for the day.

It's about daylight savings time, and the poor victimized cows. THink of the COWS, people!!!

Daylight Savings Time

confuses me
and cows

It's not nice
to take away
an hour

those poor things
on grass

cannot tell
their milking bell
to pass

udders sway
at 5 each day
no fail

farmers yell
no clock change hell
we'll bail

those bovines
might feel divine
at four

but change time
and they'll just whine
all dour

save the moos
please so to do
I beg

and save us
from farmers' plussed

confuses me
and cows.

Stop the crazy
time made hazy

There you go - don't be sayin' I'm not all about trying to please the readers!

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