Random random random

On the radio this morning:

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"There's a backup in North Raleigh - apparently there's a fat man in a Speedo jumping on a trampoline in front of the Perkins."

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Imagine my disappointment that I was nowhere near that spot.

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Our younger son is now nicknaming us. I am Shelby. Our older son is Shelby #2.

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As an FYI - this is the kid who has recently been identified as being academically gifted. If his talents develop in this area, there's no telling what I'll be called next year.

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And yes, I answer to it.

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Remember that flap-doodle thing on the roof I mentioned a while back? It's doing it again. I'm tempted to get up there and start looking for something to stomp.

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In unpacking this weekend, I came across many many boxes of photos and "memories." I can't believe I was ever that young or that thin. Thank God for hair color, or I wouldn't be able to believe I was ever that blond, either.

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In many ways, it's hard to believe that so much time has elapsed on the "I used to" clock of my life. I am now firmly planted in my 40's, with a good 20 years of adulthood behind me, and yet I have only foggiest notion of how to act like an adult. Yeah, OK, I have the house and mortgage and bills and am investing and all that, but when do I start not feeling like I'm pulling a fast one with the whole "grown up" thing?

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What I really really want is to just go to summer camp and make keychains and take swimming lessons and sleep in a cabin and have someone else make my scrambled eggs in the morning and tell me when to go to bed and what time the camp store is open so I can get some Laffy Taffy and a Coke. I would LOVE to be a kid again, with strong legs and arms and back and have endless energy and boundless curiosity and dreams of flying.

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Sure would be nice.

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New cool invention - The "Kingsford Caddy," out just in time for Father's Day. Yes, it's like a big Tupperware for your charcoal, which is why it's cool, because once you've lost yet another bag of charcoal to a rainstorm you start to think that you need to get your act together and put the damn stuff away once you use it, but now you don't have to because the caddy will protect the charcoal!

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Woot!! One less thing to have to remember!

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I bought the kids some lacrosse sticks this weekend - and guess which kid took to the whole "catch the ball in the tiny net" thing right away?

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If you guess the boy who trips over thin air and can't be trusted not to spill a glass of milk and regularly runs into walls and furniture and has had fine motor control issues since he was a wee lad, you'd be right. Congratulations, you're a genius.

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Of course, this is also the kid who knows how to program the remote, run the DVD player, and mastered the GameCube controls in under 10 seconds, so I don't know why I'm surprised.

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The other boy? Apparently got his hand-eye coordination skillz from his mother.

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Poor lad.

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I learned this weekend that if I don't shut the blinds on our bedroom windows, the sun comes right in through the slats at about 5:15 a.m. onto our sleepy dreamy heads. I believe that this is a very wrong time indeed to be awake.

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Must. Find. Curtains.

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And lastly - try this the next time you make a pork roast - rub it lovingly (singing "Little Red Corvette" in your head to get you into the mood) with salt, pepper, garlic powder, cinammon, and onion powder, the plop it in a baking dish with about a half cup of water, and roast it in a 350F oven for a while. Let it sit for a half an hour, slice, and serve with pasta salad and lima beans (which have been cooked with salt and sugar until they're nice and soft).

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The choice of wine is yours.

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This meal will give you dreams of adventure and derring-do, which star a certain Mr. Johnny Depp and involve color-coded teams who are racing against other teams to capture a bad guy and his minions (also dressed in color-coordinated outfits) who are threatning to blow up a local quarry or something. I'm not entirely sure of the plot, because one Mr. Johnny Depp kept wanting to brush my long black hair and whisper secrets into my listening device, but I can assure you that being on the teevee team is better than being on the "back-up team." Better uniforms, you know.

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Try it yourself and see if I'm wrong!