Tuesday, January 26, 2010

oooh, a ranty one!

I wish the Facebook would quit mentioning my age in every dang advert they sidebar. I KNOW how freaking old I am, I don’t CARE for it, so quit reminding me.

And no, I don’t want any UGG boots, any auto insurance, any tips to whiter teeth, and simple rules for losing my age’s worth of pounds (and how dare you for implying the degree of my lard-assedness, anyhow?). I don’t think the president really cares that I go back to school, those dancing ladies will NOT get me to purchase any product whatsoever, and I daresay that Mr. Obama could identify someone in our vast governmental bureaucracy to urge me to refinance rather than doing it himself.

I refuse to click on those links. Won’t you pledge to not do the same, and use this as your FB status for at least an hour today?


Also, just as a little op-ed thing, it’s my humble opinion that Bejeweled Blitz did not need to get any better. Why, it was just last week that the fine folks at FB (or was it PopCap?) asked our opinion of the newest beta version of their deliciously addicting game, fooling us naysayers of the new bells and whistles into believing that hey might actually be listening to us and possibly NOT deploy what, to this purist, looks like a cheat-ridden upgrade. There’s no need to purchase an extra 5 seconds of play time, is there? The game’s a minute long, you make as many good moves as you can, some games are great and some suck hobo toes, and that’s the way of life. You can’t purchase an extra few years at the end of your life just go get more points out of it, CAN YOU? No, you can’t, and so neither should you be able to buy your way into more points in a game like this.

IMHO only. Lots of folks seemed to love the new ‘improvements.’ They’re probably the ones who can’t break 100K on the regular pro version of the game. Buncha whiny babies, wanting a way to purchase a higher score, and FB GAVE it to them, regardless of what high-scoring mavens of the game (like me!) had to say. Sure, our comments counted. Not. I feel so ripped off, so undervalued. I haven’t spent HOURS A DAY over the last few months driving up my score to claw to the top of the leaderboard for NOTHING. It was hard work, requiring focus and dedication, and now some snot-nosed punk with no skill but hours to spend racking up points to but a special gem AND more time AND whatever other flat-out cheats are for offer will be able to sail to the top with no mention at ALL of that fact that he (or she) BOUGHT their way to the top. Their sullied scores will be as shiny and awe-inspiring as those from someone like me who fully intends to NOT buy their shiny new badges to flim-flam a world-ending point tally.

Now, ask me how I really feel about some stupid minute-long game that’s taken way too much of my time and attention. I'd be glad to tell you.


Oh, and it’s that time of year again when I declare that I’m officially sick and tired of being fat and vow to ‘do something about it.’ Seems the weight-loss fairies did NOT visit me this past holiday season (again!) and whisk away with 20 or some extra pounds (a good start), so it's apparently fallen to me to offload 'em myself.

Doesn’t help that this year there’s a significant HS reunion coming up, and the start reality is that if I lose a pound a week in preparation I’ll still be…

Wait…let me get the abacus…

Only about halfway to what I’d really like to lose, all in all. Frighteningly similar to what Facebook thinks I need to lose.


Plastic surgery seems the easier option at this point.


Gotta go. Much to do and the day’s growing short. Y’all stay as smooth as just-brushed teeth, mmkay?

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