Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Madly flinging epithets

Has anybody noticed that I don't cuss a whole lot on this hyar blog?

What's THAT about?

Face it, most of you wouldn't know me if I passed you in the street wearing a neon bra and leather underwear while marching with the flame-thrower afficinados of America club in the Beltane parade, so why should I worry if you happened to find out that, in the meat world, I curse like a drunken sailor getting a scrotum tattoo?

Have I developed "sensitivity" at long last?

It seems as though a liberal application of dirty words would be the cool thing to do, because I've seen some blogs by younger people and manohmanohMAN are there curse words! The "B" word is an endearment, the "F" work is a multipupose space-filler, and the "S" word is used to describe a state of mind or digestive byproduct or possessions. They spit them out like a mouthful of watermelon seeds on the fourth of July (like that one? Huh?) and don't seem to remark on any bitter aftertaste. Cussing = cool to people under 25, or so I'm led to believe.

Which makes me fee so uncool NOT using 4-letter words, but can't bring myself to type them, even if they're what I really mean and would say if I was talking to you in person and would add a little peppah to the writing.

In some ways this makes me feel like that maiden Aunt who calls a couch a davenport or the bathroom a "necessary." I'm one step away from tatting doiles for kitty condos and smelling of mothballs and dentures!

Dagnabbit all to heck.


I don't even like the word "piss."


One of my brothers can't stand the word "packet."

Personally, I do not like the four-letter slang for the girlie area that rhymes with "punt." I would go so far as to say I HATE this word. Like "whore," it seems to me one of the worst things you can call a woman.

Got any words you just don't care for? Something that makes you feel squicky inside when you say them or hear someone else say them? Feel free to allude to them in the comments, or go ahead and type them right out for the rest of us to ponder over.


This has to be short today - I'm already behind and have to leave early to go to a meeting at the bank (with a banker and everything! Because we sold our house and have M-O-N-E-Y and need to NOT spend it on frivolities like neon bras and flame throwers!) and have to get something to someone that I told them they have today and I'm nowhere NEAR getting that done, PLUS I have a meeting in 15 minutes that I'm not ready for.

So, 'bye!


mr. schprock said...

Not that they're obscene, but I've never liked the words "smarmy," "hokey," and "snarky." I used to overuse the word "unkempt" for some reason, so now I wouldn't use it even if it earns me 150 points on Scrabble.

Anonymous said...

Umm, my post today has the s-word flyin' all over the place...I DESPISE the c-word AND the p-word. My brother has a list: fart, armpit, turd -- and that's just a few.

Schprock? I'm a Scrabble 'ho and I'll pimp any word out for 150!!!

Chelle said...

I agree. I hate the c word. Not fond of the b word. However I do have a fondness for calling computer programs "bastard". I probably broke some cardinal rule. Oh well.

To get all high brow on ya: Madeline L'Engle said our language has become diluted. If you want a drop an F bomb, you could pretty much could be saying 'dagnabbit' for anyone would notice.

Which I think is similar to what your pointing out.

tiff said...

Mr S - snary? You don't like snarky? But it's so CUUUUTE!

WN - Must.Go.Read.Blog.Now. I don't mind when other people u se these words - it's not like I'm unfamiliar with them, I just can't seem to spice up my OWN space with them. Hmm - I happen to think fart is a funny owrd.....but taught our kids to use "toot" when they were little. :>

MMM3 - I agree with Madeline L'E. Too many good words go unused while too many poor choices are overused. Language is an evolving thing, but there's been too much extinction lately!

rennratt said...

I, too, hate the 'c' word. I am rather fond of 'bastard' [or 'rat bastard'] and 'sucks'.

I have a list of words that can not be used in my presence. Oddly, none of them are curse words.

**I also can't stand to watch a movie that has been tagged with pull quotes including 'zany', 'wacky', 'madcap' or 'hilarity'. This translates to 'suckage' in my world.

rennratt said...

I love the word 'piss' because it reminds me of my grandmother.

She used to say that, as I am part Irish, part Native American, I was 'born to be pissed off'.

When I was cold, I 'had piss in my veins'


When I was angry, I was 'full of piss and vinegar'.

Man, I miss her.

tiff said...

Ren - that puts a whole new spin on it for me!

Hyperion said...

This is going to sound lame, but I hate stinky.

BloggerWannabe said...

slang took on a whole new life when i moved out here to the other side o the pond, and to add insult to injury married a bloke from Manchester. Ah, the brits have such a way with words...no longer must you worry about those not so nice words...just insert some english word instead....bum for butt, shite, for...well you know. Pissed means drunk, not angry, wobbly bits is so much nicer than "package", and believe it or not, if you get a bunch of dubbies together (lads from Dublin) the c word (which up until that point was the one word guaranteed to get you slapped) started losing its punch...please note its not just the c word, the phrase is usually f'n c....isn't that sweet? don't you love the irish?

beej said...

Very amusing post. Loved it :)

But I also love to swear. And I'm well over 25 (33 to be correct).

I know when to do it, and when not to do it. But I still love to do it!