Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Welcome back

Well now, it's Tuesday again already, almost a week has gone by without a single peep outta me and so before you forget that this used to be a blog you recall having mildly enjoyed reading, I figured now's the time to put up something new.

I need to feed my faint flame of fame, therefore this shiny new post, which is but a snippet of a '69 questions' thing that NCP did to good effect. I hope that my efforts will be met with approval, because answers to random questions is probably all you're going to get this week - say, did I mention there are 69 of these questions?

Honestly!

So here you go, a dozen of the 69, in perfect numerical order:

1. The phone rings; who do you want it to be? – (Ed note: this answer was copied DIRECTLY from NCP, as it’s perfect as is) I want it to be a hang up call. I hate the phone. The only reason I even own one of the damn things is that there might one day be an emergency that requires the use of a phone to summon live saving implements in a siren-y vehicle. Gah – can’t you just send me an email?

2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart? Yes, and I will often return OTHER carts left stranded on curbs or in a perfectly good parking spot. Let me go so far as to state here that I think people who DON’T return their carts are selfish and very likely the same people who text while driving, kick puppies, tailgate, pee on the toilet seat, and leave hair in other people’s brushes.

3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener? As much as I hate to admit it, I’m totally a talker. There have been many MANY occasions when I had to, by force of WILL, kick on the internal editor to just quit blathering. Part of my inability to STFU and let other people talk is that I’m all people-pleasy and like to make folks feel good, so I get ‘on stage’ as it were to keep the noise (or conversation) going. Silences are, in most cases, fairly uncomfortable. It’s a damned hard habit to break.

4. Do you take compliments well? Now I do. In times past I’ve actually had people comment on how bad I was at accepting them. See #3.

5. Do you play Sudoku? I play Sudoku about as often as I purposefully visit a hog farm and poke piglets with a sharpened herring while humming the national anthem of Trinidad and Tobago. Which is to say, never.

6. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive? Oh, for at LEAST 5 minutes. After that I would expect the porters to arrive with the cabana, the tiki bar, the comfy chair, and some Grey Poupon to be used on whatever animal the contract hunters have procured and is about to be put over the roaring fire that some lackey will have no doubt constructed and lit. I'd try to survive for 10 minutes if it meant a minion was going on a Jim Beam run and was accosted by a wild bear/boar/tiger and needed those extra few moments to beat the offender about the head and neck with an appendage before delivering the sweet nectar of life.

7. Do you like to ride horses? No. Anything that can be scared by a gust of wind shouldn’t be ridden.

8. Did you ever go to camp as a kid? Sure thing, and loved it. Oddly, the Things haven’t gone to overnight camp, ever. Mostly because I don’t have a spare arm and leg hanging around as payment for such an activity. Six HUNDRED bucks a week is the going rate, and I can think of ohsomany other things on which to spend the 600 smackeroos. So, I’ve robbed my children of a fond childhood memory, and will probably wind up paying that 600 back in psychotherapy bills, but at least the mortgage was paid!

9. What was your favorite game as a kid? Uh….hmm. Game, eh? I was way more of a reader than a game player. I did like kick the can, because that usually meant being outside after dark, and that was pretty exciting stuff when I was in the single-digit ages, even if I WAS almost always the first one tagged and had to spend most of my time on the stoop waiting for someone to come long and kick that ol’ can to set me free. No problem – I LIKED sitting, watching the moths cloud around our streetlight, listening to the kids running around in the dark, smelling the night. It should therefore come as no surprise that I never tried very hard to hide.

10. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew s/he was married, would you go for it? I’m quite happily married, thanks, and need no other diversion in that regard.

11. Have you lied to get out of a date? No, I went on all of them I was asked on, sometimes to horrific effect. I learned my lesson when the guy I went out with REFUSED to let me out of his car on our first date until I kissed him, saying that 'he bought me dinner and so I OWED him something.' Real quailty guy, that one. So yeah, he got his kiss (it was AWFUL, like smooching a wet rubber chicken) and I got the hell out of that car, never to speak to him again. It was one of a handful of times in my life I felt like buying a whole new skin, because he made me feel so filthy and cheap. Creep.

12. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you? Yes. Dating would be one thing, but it sure does help a long-term relationship to have at least some similar views on something as important as religion, unless of course you agree to not discuss it or relish the notion of a lifetime spent arguing your particular case with the one you love. Note: Politics, another hotly contested topic of conversation, SHOULD be argued, or at least discussed, as often as digestible. Couples should fight about SOMETHING, shouldn't they?

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Whew.

More tomorrow. Y'all have a swell-tastic afternoon.

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