Saturday, June 28, 2008

Liveblogging through schmutz

I just kicked a Thing off the 'puter to say a word or two, and have discovered that when Things have the run of the 'puter for more than a moment, it become besmirched with all manner of crustal material.

The Things are, in large part, very good boys, but they are BOYS, and as such do not see the crustal material as their mama does.

Sigh.

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Living in the Souf is great, except for the fleas.

Hole shit, I've never felt this tawdry and trashy before....but the fucking FLEAS are doing me in. Animals in the house = fleas. who SUCK, and suck big time.....and not just on our BLOOD.

I'm rooting for a very cold winter this year.

VERY cold. You hear me God? VERY COLD. Hell freezin' over kind of cold. I can bundle up - you just go ahead and kill all them ticks and fleas eggs and spiders and other pestilences, and I'll stand back with my cold fingers and runny nose and say "thanks so much, can I have anuther, because my goodness, those fleas of yours, God, don't have a PURPOSE on this earth except to remind us how miserable life would be if not for the petrochemical-based anti-pestilence meds that are available to us now here in this modern age."

Otherwise, God, please just commend them to hell.....cold or hot, it's the place for a plague like fleas.

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Yeah - fleas.

Frigging pets and their delicious flea-feasty hairs.

Collars don't work. Drops don't work. Sprays don't work. Baths don't work.

They're a misery, pure and simple.

I am not at all comfy with misery, which is why the decision was made today to BOMB the house tomorrow. I am the exterminator, the reaper of flea-y souls, the commander of their deaths, and I LIKE IT!!

Mwuahahahahaaaaaaa!

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Fekking fleas. Hates them.

Loves y'all. XO - Tiff

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