Monday, March 24, 2008

Cluck, chomp, ow, splash, and oops

Easter was fulla good things, (some of which I'd intended to post as pictures here, but Blogger is bein' a booger right now and won't load my beautiful pictures of homemade challa and fancy colored eggs and the gorgeous tree in my front yard that is chock FULL of tiny white blooms....and thus I am sad. Pretend you can see them while I keep working on the problem, mmkay? Thx!)

Which were all very good and beautiful and perfectly terrifical, because what's not to like about homemade challah, Easter eggs (or, "resurrection eggs," as I heard at church yesterday. Um, yeah), and pretty flowery trees? There is NOTHING not to like about that, is what I'm saying.

Also? Temps in the upper 60's made for perfect yardwork weather, so Easter was also about lawn mowing (in which I dicover that the scent of wild onion is pervasive and perseverant), tree pruning (in which I discover that there are very few tree branches that can stand up to the combination of my grip strength and a very sharp pair of loppers), motocycle rides (in which I discover that keeping my head BEHIND the driver's once the bike is up to 40 MPH or so is a very good thing indeed), and hikes in the woods.

For which there is, of course, a story that just so happens to start with the line"one should never drink half a liter of water before one plans to go on a hike in the woods."

Particularly if the hike is at a YMCA camp that's shut up tight as a miser's purse, with nary a facility in sight that might offer relief to the bladderful Tiff.

The bladderfull that, with each step of the glorious hike in the woods, bounces ever more urgently against the pelvic bone, sloshing as the half liter of water is cycled through the kidneys, heading for the great outdoors from whence it came.

Enjoying nature is ever so much more enjoyable with a nearly empty bladder, don't you think? Me too, which is why at one point during yesterday afternoon's hike, I was not so much hiking as hiking down me hiking drawers and peeing onto the woods.

And also, as it turned out, INTO the back of my pants.


Try explaining THAT to a hiking buddy. "Hey - that leak I just took? I decided to take some of it WITH me! Yeah! Pee pants are so IN right now!"

Sigh again.

Fortunately, my hiking buddy is a mighty and understanding sort of person. This is good, because it was their motorcycle we were riding, and Little Miss Pee Pants was going to have to plop them pants onto their motorcycle seat, which less forgiving people might go "ew" at. Instead, the suggestion was made to maybe walk around the lake to give the Pee Pants time to air-dry before setting off toward home once more. Genius, I say, sheer genius. Sure wish I'd thought of it.

It was a great walk. I do love me some walking in the woods, and our little amble turned into a 30-minute hike over hill and dale (and possibly Chip, tho I did not see the bewhiskered critter) and across many a burbling stream. By the time we got back to the bike I was all dried out - hooray for evaporation and good ideas!

Next time though - no drinkee before the hikee.


Don't forget folks! Today is Dyngus Day! Yay, hooray, it's Dyngus day!

Break out the buckets of water and the whips and get to workin' it.

You know you want to. Wheeee!!!

Have a good one. I'm off to find mah bukket.

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