Friday, November 02, 2007

The one in which I tried to do headlines, but Yahoo wasn't helping me out, so I had to do something else

I'd love to see the URL for the permalink to this post....that's one long title right up there, people.

As alluded to therein, the headlines over at Yahoo, which is my normal site for badly-written headlines, are actually well written today. Bah, BUMHUG! There's almost nothing to mock, and, truth be told, I'm not in a mocking kind of mood today. I'm just not firing on all the humour cylinders (and before you shout out "are you EVER?" I would caution against doing so, for not only am I not in a funny mood, really, today, I am also maybe a little crabby and might pop you one in the face if you engage in heckling. Getting popped ain't all it's cracked up to be. I am just saying, is all.)

"Heckle" is a funny word though. Look at it! Heckle, heckle, heckle. Jekyll. Jeckle. Hyde. Dr. Jeckle and Mr Hyde! That's a pretty good idea for a children's cartoon, isn't it? A raucous wisecracking crow engages in riotous antics during the day, and at night drinks a mysterious potion (that might or might not be slightly steaming in a foggy manner) and turns into a monstrous shambling wreck of a human who is, not surprisingly, bent on mayhem and the possible destruction of all things good in this world.

(pretend that the pictures I wanted to put in here of the ravening pair and the ravishing duo actually were uploaded, and that the mathematical formula I was going to ascribe to the magical combination of the two of them is in place, and that you laugh softly at my whimsical sense of humour. You can do that, right? Thank you)

Who WOULDN'T want to watch that, I ask?

OK, so it's not one of my best ideas, I'll admit, but it does smack of stream-of-consciousness, which is a fine way to live a life, insofar as it absolves one of having to create long-term memories or to accept responsibility for one's own actions. Live off the top of your head, I say - live right on top of the curve of reality, soak up the full impact of life like the little rainbow of happiness that you are! BE the rainbow!

Sigh. I sure wish the headlines were better. This rambling on is tiring. Not much less tiring though than the dream I had in which I was at HS Truman's (though, really? it could also have been FDR's) house and he and several young children were
sitting around the piano singing a slightly bawdy song, which I thought was inapproriate, so I pitched in with the "Ma-na-ma-na" song, which was a lovely counterpoint to the ditty they were trilling which, tangentially, involved "little Alice and her pet constrictor," after which time all the children in their white cotton dresses and summer suits began marching around the first floor of the home, up and over the wide first step of the dark wooden staircase that led up to a dark (why dark?) second floor. "Ma-na'ma-na" rang through the high-ceilinged rooms, accompanied by the former President's piano meanderings. The sun streamed in through the double french doors, the sea air flounced the white curtains at the windows, and I noticed a small transparent spider crawling up the front of my black I woke up.

You know what? My brain just ain' innit today. Whyn't y'all go over to Wordnerd's place for a good recipe that's guaranteed to leave you tummy happy and your arteries hatin' you, or head on over to Tammie's for one of the funniest entries I've read in a long time. As bonus for all y'all who might be hesitating - it's about BOOBS.

Is it time to start drankin' yet? Please God, let it be 5 o'clock already.

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