Thursday, August 24, 2006

Detritus, again

Y'all, after the previous post and all it's "oooh, I'm a WRITER"-ishness of it, I thought it best to bring this hyar blog back to it's more familiar turf, the GIANT BIN OF GLIB, and pick therefrom in order to establish that I am not tramping down the path toward Walden and my chakras just yet.


Shall we dive in and see what's at the bottom of the bin? Hold your nose and let's go!


I feel it's imperative to establish something right now.

The coolest Muppet ever is Fozzie Bear.

Say what you want about his stupid jokes and his over-the-top approach and his neediness, he's still cooler than even Beaker or Professer Honeydew (thought, man, what a schtick THOSE two had), or Statler and Hilton (though, man, what a schtick THOSE two had) or Kermit and....

Oh wait. Miss Piggy.

Shoot. Maybe SHE was the coolest Muppet ever.

Or was it Grover? Animal? Sam the Eagle?

Argh!!!! This requires more thinking! And perhaps a Top Ten List just to help me sort though my conflicted emotions on this highly important issue.


A poem in honor of my dogs

Dogs are great,
Dogs are cute
They like to run and
sleep and toot.

They sometimes like
to un-lid bins
of household trash
and then dive in

Chicken skin and
moldy fruit
coffee grounds and
gross meat juice
potato peels and
old snot rags
baloney wrappers
sandwich bags
they strew about
and roll around
in reeking heaven
on the ground.

But dogs get caught
and shut inside
the dark garage
where they can't hide,
to wait until
Mom comes home
to wash them down
with the garden hose
while gagging at
their rancid fur
their blackened feet
those dirty curs.

Sure, dogs are cute,
"man's best friend"
they love you to
the bitter end.
We love them back
our fuzzy pets
just not so much
when they smell


And, even though it's apparent from my recent audioposts that I do indeed have a markedlly pronounced accent, this blog will retain its name.

The LOOK, however, is about to change.


LASTLY (Wake up! We're at the end!), I have a little contest for you! Woo!!

It's time again from the "Challenge of 500 Words", but this time I want your pictures.

Yes, YOU READ THAT RIGHT! You can provide the picture from which all interested folk can write a story of 500 words or less, to be featured on this here site as a little linky lurve back to YOUR site, on which you will post your story.

(Man, I'd totally love it if someone would make a sweet button or graphic y'all can display as proud participants in this literary exercise. Anyone?? Hmmm?)

Anyhow, here's the deal - the FIFTH person to e-mail me a picture of their choosing (and please, no porn or depictions of graphic violence) is THE WINNER! We will use your visual muse to stimulate our cortices to produce art of such quailty that the earth will be a better, shinier, happier place.

Oh, and just to be fair, I promise not to just use something of my own and SAY one of you sent it to me too. is my e-mail.

Ready, set, GO!


Chelle said...

Animal or Kermit. Fozzie's good. Animal rocks.

Carrie said...

Oh I love your dog poem!

I would have to come up with a creative photo. Not sure I can do that.

Rick said...

Fozzie boxers drive the girls wild! You think yer gonna get five photo submissions?

tiff said...

MMM3 - see? the opinions! Oy!

Carrie - I do love my dogs, but they're a HUGE pain

rick - is that a bear in your shorts or are you just happy to see me? Heheheheh.

Also? I dont know about the photos. Why not send one in and see if you're the lucky winner? Anything's got to be better than the one I used last time.

Tracy Lynn said...

I have to put my vote in for Animal although the Monster was cool too.

I can't wait to see the new look. WHEEE!

Daisy Mae said...

Graphic? Did someone say graphics? I'm yer gal! I'd be glad to design a button. I'll send you an email and we can figure out what you might like it to look like.

And by the way, Miss Piggy rocked!

WenWhit said...

Most excellent dog poem there, Tiff. Clearly you speak with the voice of experience! :)